The Teeny Bikini Body

just a girl's struggles of trying to be lean


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The Training – what up?

It’s been DIFFICULT. As Ricky has gotten to know me, he has pushed, challenged, tracked, taught, and has been a relentless trainer. Although I consider myself advanced, this has been challenging.  

SELF DOUBT. We all feel this way. Ricky takes me to a level that I wouldn’t have ever reached on my own. Why?  He has a belief in me that I don’t have. He’s tough on me. And although I complain, I like it. 

Bad training days. I have it. I feel weak, like I let him down, let myself down. The frustration. I know it’s not supposed to be easy. Changing my attitude meant not talking negative. Hard for me.

The Learning: there’s so much.  My form, the movement of each exercise compared to how I used to do it is so different. New exercises that I’d be to chicken to try on my own. The power cleans. Fixing form on front squats. Concentrating on recovery. Foam rolling. The endless knots on my back, my calves, quads, traps, etc. Ricky has taught me so much.

Progress. It’s cool. I love it. I just look in the mirror. And my muscles look more defined. My abs are getting tighter. Friends are asking me what I’m doing.  “I’m training!” I tell them. 

Losing friends. This part sucks. I’ve motivated some people to start working out and I love that. Other people see it as vain. Is it vain?  Maybe. How else would we keep going, writing, creating, building without some vanity involved. We would be stagnant. It’s not vanity, it’s the will, the confidence to DO. They joke that the only food my friends eat is salad. We are strong not anorexic. I hate stereotypes. What people don’t get is that working out is the thing that makes me feel confident in a cynical world. If you don’t like me, it’s probably because you don’t get me. It hurts but I just have to move on.

I come from a family riddled with chronic illness. Partially why I’m so motivated. I have intermittent asthma that can quickly become severe seasonally. I use an inhaler every day twice a day to prevent attacks. It can’t stop me. I always have to get breathing in check to keep going. When signs of extreme exhaustion hit me like a ton of bricks, it means something is wrong. I have to keep going. 

It’s rewarding. I feel accomplished. I feel influential.

TAKEAWAY. I love training with Ricky. Not all training is good. Mine is good. Really good. I can’t stop! I want more. I’m ready to work!

Thanks for listening.

Later 

L.