Back to Basics – Self-Obsession


When I was younger a no makeup selfie would have been out of the question. We live in a world of selfies, self-obsession, and an ultra-connected, scrutinizing world.  And the more that we scrutinize the celebrities, we inwardly examine ourselves, trying to determine our worth.

Maybe social media allows us to peek into other people’s lives, obsessed, envious, yet competitive.  It’s a new kind of survival of the fittest, where the “have’s” and the “have-nots” become categories.  The haves are the followed, and the have nots are followers.  We follow to be followed.

Yet here we are in our mundane lives, seeking excitement by social media.

Nonetheless, we learn, we read, we share and advancements have taken new strides. We become informed.  No more having to go to the library to read, or wait for the daily paper for yesterday’s news.  Twitter allows immediate news no matter how insignificant posted every second of the day.  We are all being watched.  You cannot commit a crime, make a fool of ourselves, be a bully to someone else in public without being photographed or filmed by phone.  We are the paparazzi.   We cannot speak freely without criticism. Hawkers of racism, inappropriateness, are waiting to tell you why what you did is wrong.

That being said, we are all going back to basics.  The “#nomakeupselfie” is a new trend to show that we are real, we are not photo-shopped, and despite the world of beauty, basic is beautiful as well.

So now what? Narcs of the world are watching and sometimes you have to realize that criticism is good to a point.  Social media keeps us in check in some ways.  Just stay away from the negators, haters, the ones that don’t hold any validity in what they say.

That being said, self-obsession has brought the shy hermits out, allowing them to express themselves with their fingertips.

Here’s some tips to keep sane:

1) Do a #nomakeupselfie

2) Ignore all haters

3) Check yourself.  Sometimes you are wrong.

4) Read, read, read. Information will keep you keen.

5) Who do you admire and why?

6) Selfies say it’s okay to love yourself

7) Always see positivity

8) Be a cheerleader

9) Never be a hater (wasted energy)

That’s it.



The Excuse Factory: Who do we trust?

Caitlin Rice - FITNESS Inspiration! This girl's body is amazing!This is a tasteful picture of Caitlin Rice.  She’s one of my biggest idols.  Look at her she looks damn good and she worked hard to get it.  To me, she looks absolutely fantastic. She’s not to skinny, which I like.

A couple of comments on Pinterest was that this photo was photo-shopped and that she looks disproportionate.  That may or may not be true, but the truth is it’s being dismissed before the truth is even being found out. What’s interesting is that there are no negative comments from men.

In your own inner circle, how many people do you consider trustworthy?  Would they make fun of you, find ways to dismiss your talents, or are they your biggest fan? How many people want you to stay beneath them?  An even bigger question, are you one of those people trying to push people down?!!!!!  Geez, get a hold of yourself and take one long look in the mirror and slap yourself.  It’s time for self-evaluation.  Do we feel so insecure that we start a factory of excuses at the expense of others?

Competition is always good, it drives us to strive to be better, gives us motivation, taking us out of our comfort zone but there’s a fine line between constructive criticism and plain old negativity.

Signs that your inner circle is not trustworthy:

1. They schedule a dinner out with you for Saturday and Saturday comes and they text you, “Elena and I are going out, do you want to come?”  (Huh?)

2.  You notice that they can’t seem to keep a secret… airing out everyone’s dirty laundry.  E.G. “Uh, yeah, she’s got a crazy drunk father.”

3. They judge everything you do with a negative comment. People notice you’ve lost weight, and they say, “It doesn’t seem like you lost that much.  It must be all water weight.”

4. You tell them, don’t tell anyone that I’m not going to the party because you are tired.  You tell everyone… I’ve got another event to attend.  They say, “Oh she really didn’t feel like going.” (OMG! Really?!!!)

5.  They tell you, “Oh yeah… can you buy that for me?  I don’t have time.  I’ll pay you back.” They never do of course and you feel like a real sucker.  You mention it and they keep changing the subject.

6.  You lend them your best outfit, and suddenly that can’t seem to find it. (Arghhhhhh!)

7. For some reason, you are getting a lot of attention on girls/guys night out, and they keep telling you to stop flirting and that you are out of control.  The funny thing is that all you are doing is standing there.

8. They start flirting hard with you girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other.

Ok well I think you get it.  Take that poisonous person out of your life.

Signs that you are the one who is untrustworthy:

1.  You can’t help but be selfish.  You feel like if you’re not the life of the party, you’ll do anything to become it.  Like flirting with other people’s boyfriends/girlfriends.

2.  You love gossip, and the attention it gets you so you try find all the gossip you can get so that you can tell everyone what you found out.

3.  People don’t want to tell you their secrets anymore, because they found out you can’t keep one.

4. You think that people think it’s cute when you keep their stuff.  You tell them sorry but hate that they remembered that you still have it.

5.  You start noticing that you have a high turnover of friends and that nobody is returning your calls.

6.  People don’t want to go out with you anymore because they’ve been burned so much. You kept going for what you thought was the most exciting event despite your plans with friends.

7.  You start noticing that everyone becomes quiet when you walk into the room.

8.  You can’t help but say negative things to your friend that seems like they are doing better than you.

Well, if you are the untrustworthy person, I recommend you change yourself.  After all, Karma’s a beeee-atch.    Start developing this thing called empathy.  In other words, put yourself in the other persons shoes.  If you can’t change, no one can help you and your life will continue to be in disarray.

Live in harmony and take negativity out of your life.


Peace and Love,







http www youtube com watch v=Ey2XBzuDtck As I…

As I was listening to The Who’s song …”The Real Me” from the album Quadrophenia, I realized that we must maintain our authentic selves. I’ve been nursing a concussion the past week and it gave me a lot of time to think. Well girls and boys, life is much easier when you try to be authentic. What does that mean? I means like being real. You know when people are bothering you and you let it brew for days on end and act all aloof and stuff? Well, if you believe it’s a person you can talk to and it won’t be a full fledged altercation… I say talk to them. Let it all out in the open. If it’s an unreasonable person, then write it out as if you are writing them a letter. If they are TOXIC in your life, be cordial but maintain a good distance. Life is too short to be surrounded by toxicity. If it’s someone you work with that you have to deal with… well then try to be friendly… yeah kill them with kindness or find a way where you can have a diplomatic cordial relationship with them. I’ve seen wars brew because those attempts to maintain neutral ground has never been attempted. I know, sometimes it’s impossible.

Hey, can’t hurt to try right?

Well, why am I talking about this? Well you heard how stress can make you sick… it really can. The more attempts at trying to de-stress your life the better off you will be.

Stress can take control your life! Don’t you want to be in CONTROL???? Yes, of course. Start by letting go of all these things that you let brew and bury in that gut of yours.

To become a better self… start by letting this stuff out, fixing your relationships, or staying away from those that can’t be fixed. And while your at it listen to this song…

That’s all. Peace and love always… ❤